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Posted by Robin on October 27, 2009 22:35 in short stories, feedback (4)
Smoke Break
Nick put down his pen and put his face into his hands, groaning softly. "Fucking deadlines..." he thought to himself and sighed. He looked at the clock and got up. He slammed the binder shut. Dennis looked up. Their desks were opposite of each other. Nick walked over to the couch and dropped down onto it.
The office space the two men shared was tiny. Tiny and grossly overpriced. But they were a fresh start-up and had little choice given their chosen location and budget. Two desks, crappy office chairs, one table with a coffee maker and assorted materials and a couch. That was all they had, and it drove Nick insane. '10-hour work days in a fucking closet' was how he referred to it to anyone who'd listen to him.
Dennis looked at Nick, sitting on the couch, head backwards, and grinned. "You thinking what I'm thinking?" he said while he opened his desk drawer and stuck his hand in. "Fuck yeah, let's go." Nick responded with a playful smile on his face. Dennis got up and walked over to the coat rack, grabbed both the coats and threw one towards Nick, which landed on his face.
Their tiny office space was on the 12th floor of Armada Plaza, which was a one-hundred percent smoke-free building. This was both a blessing and a curse. It was a good thing because this gave them a reason to get some well-needed physical activity, it got them out of the office a couple of times a day and since the windows wouldn't open, some fresh air. It was bad because both of them worked better with a cigarette dangling in their mouth or situated somewhere between two fingers.
When Nick and Dennis reached the elevators, they did their regular shtick. "You win, automated ride down. I win, it's walking time again." Nick grinned to Dennis. "Alright, on three."
After raising and lowering their fists twice, they showed their respective choices. Nick had rock, while Dennis had opted for scissors. "Dammit!", Dennis grunted. In the meantime, Nick had already opened the door to the staircase and with a huge grin, held out a welcoming arm. Dennis sighed and walked through it, preparing for yet another lovely stroll down the stairs. Nick chuckled. He knew Dennis had an almost obsessive need to choose scissors, and he enjoyed forcing him to walk the stairs, as his beer belly was visibly growing by the day. Nick, on the other hand, felt he didn't need the exercise, but enjoyed it anyway. If only because he could torment Dennis with it.
A good 10 minutes later they walked out of the door leading to the stairs, and out of the plaza entrance hall. In front of Armada Plaza there was the typical – parking spots, large open spaces with potted plants and a single ashtray for visitors and employees. There was currently nobody outside. It was, after all, the middle of winter and as such it was fairly cold.
"So, what are your plans for the weekend?" Dennis asked while offering Nick a cigarette.
"To be honest, I have no idea. There are a couple of half-baked plans to choose from, but nothing's popping out screaming ‘Do me! Do me!'" Nick responded after taking his first deep drag. He kicked a rock onto the parking lot and added, "But if you're asking whether Julie's been in touch, then no, she hasn't called."
Dennis grinned, "I was aiming for that, yes."
They stood there silently for a while, Nick looking up at the sky and Dennis lost in thought, humming almost inaudibly. That is, until he cleared his throat.
"Seriously, dude. Why haven't you just called her?" and he looked at Nick with an earnestly expectant look.
"Why I don't feel like calling her? Simple. Everything's fucking weird. We met once, had a great time.” He paused. “I did call, actually, but she wasn't there, so I left a message on her voice mail. Up until this point, that has been the end of the story. She knows I called – that I might just be interested – and she hasn't returned the phone call. The ball's in her court, and I'm happy keeping it there until she's willing to play." He nearly spat out the last couple of words.
Dennis sighed and grabbed his mobile phone.
"What's her number?"
"Screw you, dude."
"I'm serious, gimme her number."
"Hell no. Stay out of this." Nick said as he dropped his cigarette butt on the ground and stomped on it, after which he added "I'm going up" and promptly walked inside. Dennis watched him call the elevator and flipped open his phone.
"Fine, don't give me the number. I'll get it either way." Dennis muttered and dialed.
"Yeah, hi. It's Dennis. Yeah, it's been what... Three weeks now? Hah, no, no. Hey, remember that Nick got all cozy and shit with a colleague of yours at that Halloween party? Yeah, Julie, that's her. Y'see, he's lost her number and isn't sure whether or not he'd given her his number. Ah, well, that's because he's, err, quite busy with a deal, appointments and whatnot. Yeah, he does need to relax, I tell him to chill out regularly. But back to Julie. Uhm, I thought I'd help him out while he's being all stressed, you know, as a sort of reward. Yeah. Uhuh. Lemme get out a pen. Mmm. Ya. Right. Got it. Thanks, Susan, I owe you. Yeah, sure, I have some time open coming week. Coffee? Sounds like a plan! Sure, I'll give you a call after this is all done and I'll tell you what happened, and we'll set up a date and time, alright? Thanks!" and he hung up. After lighting another cigarette, which he felt was his own reward for doing the right thing, he typed in Julie's number and pressed ‘dial'.
Nick opened the office door and with far too much anger threw his coat on the couch. He hated it when people tried to interfere with his personal life. If Julie was truly interested, she'd have called back by now. How so was it his responsibility to keep on trying to get in touch? He was more than willing to adhere to the age-old ideas of what a gentleman was, but he wasn't desperate. What the hell did he expect anyway? He wasn't all that special, and she was. Tall, long wavy hair and surprisingly smart in addition to being, quite literally, the prettiest girl at the party.
Susan had introduced them and they had talked throughout the evening. If anyone had asked him then, he would have said there definitely was a click. He'd enjoyed himself enormously and had hoped for a follow-up. So far, there had been no indication of a follow-up ever occurring, and he'd given up hope days ago. It was so incredibly typical that Dennis would bring it up now, when Nick had already deemed it too late. He sighed and let himself fall backwards onto the couch. He closed his eyes and hoped he could let it slide before the day was over.
"Dude, Julie on the phone." Nick suddenly heard, and after he'd opened his eyes he saw that Dennis was handing him his phone. Looking up to Dennis, he mouthed "what the fuck, man..." but Dennis merely shook the phone and mouthed that Nick should simply "take the fucking phone."
Nick sighed and took it.
"Nick. Hey, yeah. Hah, of course I remember. Yes, I did give you a call you on that number, why? Oh, OH. You lost your phone?" Nick pulled the phone from his ear and checked the number. Yep, it was different. "Yeah, sorry, I'm here. No, nope. I figured we'd get in touch eventually. No worries, I'm not that easily freaked out."
Dennis made a laughing motion and Nick waved his hand to get him to stop.
"This Friday? Yeah, sure. No, I'm free. I'd love to. Yup, got it. I'll see you there. Of course I'll be on time, wouldn't want to keep you waiting. I guarantee that you won't have to wait. Alright. Sure. See you then. Bye."
"What'd I say?" Dennis said smugly while he pushed his seat back to put his feet on his desk, where he'd sat down after handing Nick the phone.
"Nothing. You asked for her number. And still, fuck you for going behind my back on this."
"Relax, it worked out fine, didn't it?"
"It did work out fine. I can't believe I thought she was a bitch, and then it turns out she lost her phone and never got my message. Thanks, man. We're having dinner on Friday, it seems."
Nick smiled his stupid "aww yeah" smile and Dennis grinned.
"So, what are YOUR plans for this weekend?" Nick asked Dennis.
"Not much, watch a movie and hit the sack early."
"Heh, guess I win for a change."
"You deserve it, you slag."
"But it does seem like I'm having coffee with Susan sometime this week." Dennis said with a grin.
"Nice! It's a good week, isn't it?"
They nodded, looked at their work and sighed.
"You thinking what I'm thinking?"
"Fuck yeah, let's go."
A new story will be published next week, so check back! Thanks for reading this far!
| Jasper | |
 28/10/2009 | It feels to me that you are switching the perspective. As in, you switch from seeing the world through Nick's eyes to Dennis's eyes and back. Could just be me, but I think it makes the whole thing a bit of a restless read.
Just my two cents. =) |
| Robin | |
 28/10/2009 | I could argue that since there's a narrator whose perspective we're seeing this from, the perspective is solid, so I will. The narrator isn't very involved though - he's merely narrating. That said, though, if you mean that the focus seems twitchy, as in, now the focus is on Nick, now it's on Dennis, then I'm starting to see your point ;) And I'll take the wish fulfillment of the hand in the drawer into consideration, but you know I love to leave you hanging ;) |
| roos | |
29/10/2009 | i did find it hard to remember who's nick and who's dennis, got confused a bit.
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| Jasper | |
02/11/2009 | Yeah, I had a feeling my terminology was wrong, but I think you do understand what I was talking about.
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